I asked members of my pua forum about their experiences of AA. Here’s some responses I got.
“Brad, I can’t explain it. It’s like you know all you’ve gotta do is just walk over and talk to the girls, but I just can’t do it!”
“My biggest sticky point ever was AA. I was just born as a silent and shy guy. Every time I was thinking about approaching I got so nervous I could feel my heart beating in my chest. There where times I was afraid it would pop out of my chest… lol. This fear and nervous feeling made sure I never approached and if I approached, I just had major freeze-outs.”
“I build myself up before going out to meet girls, convincing myself that I am not actually that bad. I’m reasonable good looking, and quite intelligent. So my efforts to build a good mood work, and I feel great. As soon as opportunities present them self, things fall apart! I’ll not approach a girl I take a liking to, thinking I’ll speak to them later when in truth the fear stops me. This is turn depresses me slightly, taking away my good feelings I came out with. It’s a vicious cycle, and it leads to me drinking more than I intend to (to get that good feeling back) and being that AFC who watches the hot girls wishfully.”
So, what is approach anxiety? AA is an overwhelming emotion and it can be almost paralysing at the time. Specifically, it’s an emotional response to the thought of approaching unknown women. Through my research, I’ve found that AA stems from an unrealistic and sometimes irrational view of women and social interaction.
In my last post, Why Create an Approach Anxiety Blog?, I compared AA to a phobia. According to Wiki :
” A phobia is an irrational, intense, persistent fear of certain situations, activities, things, or persons. The main symptom of this disorder is the excessive, unreasonable desire to avoid the feared subject.”
What causes that ‘irrational, intense, persistent fear of” approaching women? It’s a combination of things! And unless a guy corrects his view of women and interacting with them, AA won’t go away… it will be there forever!
